Photographer or Writer?

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I’ve sat here for hours now wondering what to post today. Whether I’m just in a fog, or if it’s truly what they call “Writer’s block”, I have no idea. I’m starting to think that photography may be closer to my “calling” than writing. As much as I love words, it seems much easier for me to pick up my camera and snap a shot than it is to sit here in front of a blank screen.

I’m my worst critic. Whether I’m writing or looking at my photographs, fear and doubt seems to creep into all I dream of doing.

Before I started blogging,  writing was a joyful outlet for the millions of thoughts that ran through my head. I never worried about whether my grammar or punctuation was correct, because no one ever saw what I had written. I didn’t worry about anyone “seeing” that I have just a ninth grade education. I would grab a pen, and my journal and just write my heart out. I get so intimidated seeing all the wonderful blogs on here, all the talented and well-educated writers, that I wonder why I even started this journey. I haven’t given up on writing, nor have I given up on the dream of writing something special someday, but I’ve talked myself into a corner of sorts. Self-doubt has taken hold.

Since starting this blog, just two weeks ago, my photographs have been so well received, and I thought, “Hey, I can be a photographer!”, maybe I could even make a living taking photos! (I’m still wondering about the punctuation in that last sentence) But, then I allowed the same old doubt to creep into my dream. I know nothing about photography. I don’t know anything about aperture, shutter speeds, lighting, or any other part of what “real” photographers know. I just know that for my entire life I’ve loved taking pictures. I was once told, “You see everything as if through a view finder”. I thought that was the best compliment ever! I have a cheap little Canon that I use, and take all my photos on “Auto”, because I have no idea how to use any of the other “gadgets” on there. There is no money in our weekly budget for a better camera, or for photography classes, and to be honest, I don’t WANT to know all that. I just want to take pictures, and possibly figure out how to make some money by selling my photos. Am I just a dreamer? Is this even possible? Questions, questions, questions. When did I become so timid, when did I lose that girl who dared to do anything, and to hell with what anyone thought? I need to find her again. NOW!

Oh gosh, this is sounding like such a pity post, one of those “please tell me I’m good enough” pieces of crap you see on Facebook every day! I’m going to post a photo, sit back, read my favorite bloggers, and keep my dreams alive. Hopefully I can kill the self-doubt demon that wants to take over before it squashes my hopes and my enthusiasm.

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14 comments on “Photographer or Writer?

  1. Hey, Kim. I’m dropping you a line to tell you that we all need praise, even as we get older. Validation comes in many forms. You’ll find, as you continue blogging, that the community of bloggers online are super. SUPER. Super friendly, super supportive, and super helpful. The majority of people who comment on my blog are members of a LinkedIn group called Bloggers Helping Bloggers. We all tend to comment on each others’ blogs. No one is “judgy” either, and so your education or lack thereof is NOT an issue. 🙂

    Also, the fact that you take your own pictures is GREAT. Pictures that accompany blog posts get ranked higher than those that don’t. As a blogger who is less than a year old (celebrating my first blogoversary this month), I can tell you that finding images and attributing the photographer properly has been one of my biggest struggles as a blogger – so you have a good leg up on everyone there. 😉

    As far as your writing dreams go, the cool thing I’ve found out this past year is that “self-publishing” exists now. Wonderful news for writers! This means anyone – anyone – can get published in this day and age. In fact, this seems to be the option many traditionally published authors are even taking since the author has more control over everything (from cover design to editing to, well, everything)!

    Keep dreaming, keep pursuing those dreams, and keep blogging! You’ll find happiness in blogging for sure, I’m sure. 🙂

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  2. I had to laugh a bit at your worries about punctuation… I have a university education and I still question where to put the commas, lol! Your posts flow easily and convey honesty and that is what makes for great writing. And the few pics I’ve seen so far are beautiful! Keep it up!

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  3. Your writers block didn’t last long Kim, i just commented on your lovely story. (Im going backwards in the reader)
    I think most people who are creative would seriously love to make a living from it, I know I would, but I tend to think of my stuff as more of a hobby. I have no clue where to begin selling things.
    You could go on a photography course? You could do your own illustrations then hun 🙂 x

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  4. See, I think you can do both. You write well, and your photos are amazing. Maybe a pairing of the two would even be in order. At the risk of sounding cliche, don’t give up the dream because it hasn’t given up on you.

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    • Thanks Rose…That is the one thing I have going for me. I have never given up on a dream, no matter how many times I have started, and not done it. Dreaming is what keeps us all going, no matter where it may lead, or if it never takes us anywhere. As long as I’m still dreaming and planning..I’m still on the journey!

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  5. Stick with it, Kim. Writing and photography can both serve your need for creativity and the rest of the world’s need for interesting ideas and striking pictures. Do not let the demons or writer’s block prevail!

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